In an instant, including pregnancy.
I realize there can be negative consequences it has now (losing any chance of a good job, losing most family and friends and being left in the dust, scorned by the public consistently). But I would do it.
The biggest hurdle is cost. How do I pay for the surgeries, the hormone replacement therapy for life, the counseling/psychiatrist to even begin. Not to mention the cost of changing all my past records.
As long as I can remember, I always had feminine desires. I always wanted to dress as a girl and do girlie things. I always wanted to be caressed by a man. I always wanted to nurture my children and yes even take care of a home.
I understand the complexities in being a woman. Living full time trying to find/keep a job. Looking perfect when you leave your house and so many other little things. Also just having a very bad day. Well, just me maybe.
I would put up with cramps and bleeding every month, having babies, being discriminated against in the workplace, other female physical problems, harassment, etc. Because being a woman is inside of me. There are things that males have to put with also. So I could certainly deal with the things women have to put up with.
I have thought about transitioning, and in addition to the I want to pass as a woman or at least blend into society. I don't want to always be questioned about my gender. Cliche, as it sounds, I know I really 'am' a woman and I would want everyone else to see and understand that.
I am a female, Working on the outside now. I do know that being a woman is not about glamour and being beautiful all the time. I finally came to terms with how I feel and have learned to live with it. I accept that some days I am, some days I'm not ... the woman I want to be.
I have the commitment to change on the outside so I will just be who I am and accept that the person in the mirror is close to who I am inside, even though the reflection is not always who I want to see or who I really see.
Absolutely I want to be a total and complete woman. No second thoughts. In my mind and my heart, I am a woman and I love it.
Yes I want to be a woman, I know it is not all roses, but I would be the woman that I was meant to be.
"I’m pretty, but I’m not beautiful. I sin but I’m not the devil. I’m good but I’m not an angel." ~ Marilyn Monroe